Learn The 5 Most Effective Parenting Skills !
Posted: Thursday, January 28, 2010
by Laura Kaine
YourParentingHelp
Looking for effective parenting skills means you really care and know you can do better in your communication with your child. You probably know that it's by changing your own behavior that you can make your child change his atittude and therefore have a better relationship with him, a more peaceful family life. As a parent, I know we don't always take the time to explain things although it's the key ! Understanding children is very important and helps us understand what consequences our words can have, literaly how children preceive us and the things we're trying to make them understand. Rules that seem unfair to children will not be accepted nor applied. It makes sense, doesn't it ?
Being a good parent simply means giving to our children all the love we have and all the values and tools to make them become responsible, sensitive, tolerant adults able to express their feelings, resolve problems. We can't react impulsively to really teach something to our children. That's why the 5 following effective parenting skills will help you.
1. Be a role model for your child. Remember he imitates you, discovers the world and precisely the adult world through your own behaviour. Be the adult you want your child to become.
2. Always remain calm. You teach nothing if you yell at your child. Never react impulsively in front of your child. Contain your outbursts. Feeling angry is normal. Cool down in another room if you need. Keep your voice down but speak with a firm tone when needed. No need to scream.
3. Always explain the consequences of his bad behaviour to your child. Tell him what you say no to. Reward his good behaviour. Often, children keep having a bad behaviour because they don't understand. When they do, they can choose how to behave by knowing what will be the consequence, how you will react, what they'll get out of it. This is one of the most effective parenting skills in the long run. Start now.
4. Encourage your child to build his self-esteem. Tell him he's capable of doing things but show that making mistakes is ok. Don't seek perfection. Pay attention to what he does, what is difficult for him, notice when he makes an effort. Don't do things for him. Let him try.
5. Tell and show your unconditional love for your child. Always express that you love him no matter what. Some of his behaviours are not acceptable, that's why you punish them, but those punishments never diminish your love for him. Kiss and hug your child and say "I love you". It's very important. Children sometimes doubt our love for them. They need to be reassured.
Applying these effective parenting skills will make a difference. Depending on your situation, you might find them a bit difficult to apply, which is normal if your child already has strong bad habits or has taken the control and is somehow making the decisions. Parenting methods are made for parents who are in this situation, to guide them and support them in the deep change they can make thanks to what these methods provide. I personally applied one and with some parents we made a selection of the most effective ones. We built a website to spread the word about it and help parents chosing one. You'll find the link in my bio if you're interested. It's never too late !
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